Today is “do-able”.

I was officially diagnosed with fibromyalgia in 2001, but a car accident in 1998 was the catalyst for my chronic pain. By 2011, I was pretty confident in my ability to handle my fibromyalgia. I was great at scheduling out my household duties with rest included in the schedule. I had one primary doctor who I liked. She prescribed my medications and understood fibromyalgia. I was happily married since 2004 to a man I had known since childhood, my brother’s best friend. My life was “do-able”, that is a big statement for a person with fibromyalgia.

Around Christmas of 2011, I started having problems with my memory. I often felt light-headed and giddy. I was getting heartburn all the time. By the summer of 2012, I was mentally vacant. I had lost a major amount of weight. I was saying and doing things I had no recollection of. I would be reminded of what had taken place but I could not remember … by September 1st I was admitted to the hospital with severe idiopathic pancreatitis.

Pancreatitis is known as the drinking man’s disease, except I am not a man and I did not drink enough to do this to my pancreas. I contributed, don’t get me wrong. I drank alcohol, I had begun to eat poorly, and I smoked heavily. But my pancreas was kinked and had a calcium blockage that was shutting down my pancreas, basically, my body and brain were starving for nutrients. I barely weighed 100 lbs. My triglycerides were sky-high, I was pre-diabetic, my blood pressure was high and my gallbladder needed to be removed. All of these things were contributing to my pancreatic problems.

I survived seven surgeries and twelve lengthy hospital stays. On two different occasions, I was asked by the surgeon what lengths I wanted him to go to preserve my life. My husband, myself and the surgeon did not believe I would make it off the table. I signed a DNR (Do Not Resuscitate) both times. I was so ill I didn’t think I could take much more. My husband and I said our goodbyes but he asked me to promise to try to wake up. I promised I would try. Somehow, I did wake up. Every time.

Recovery was a slow process, I finally got all the tubes and stents removed from my stomach in July of 2015. Now, what was I going to do? I never planned on surviving. I could not remember much about the past 4 years … just bits and pieces. I was utterly lost.

I found adult coloring books and began using them. It helped me make choices, the colors to pick and the pictures to color. It was mind work and it was working. I found Zentangles next. You learn different patterns and you put them together in a picture of sorts. This was teaching me spacial recognition. I felt my brain begin to work again.

In September of 2016, I ended up with a severe fibromyalgia flare that just would not stop. I was so heavily medicated for those years during my pancreas problems my fibromyalgia did not surface. But it was now back with a vengeance! I couldn’t sleep, I couldn’t concentrate, I felt as if I were walking through sand. Just walking to the bathroom and back to the sofa exhausted me. I was hospitalized with severe anemia. I was told I was close to having a massive heart attack. A heart attack? Unbelievable. I had a blood transfusion and iron injections. I felt better almost immediately. I now take B12 injections and an iron supplement.

I have been hospital free since September of 2016. I wanted to share my story with you because I have had to start over with my journey towards “do-able.” I am well on my way to getting my fibromyalgia back in check. I did it before my pancreas problems, and I will do it now. I tackle one day at a time until I reach “do-able.”



Author: I tripped over a stone.

I am happily married to Jeff. We are full-time RVers. We have two Goldendoodles; Dora and Dezzie. I have had Fibromyalgia for over 20 years and have learned a few tricks to deal with it, but it is my stone in the road! I am a Fibromyalgia Advocate. I have co-authored a book, The Shadow Boxers, Fighting Fibromyalgia (your personal journal.) It is available on Amazon and on my blog. I enjoy making Tribe Bracelets, also available now on my blog. Stone in the Road is another blog of mine where I post a collection of stories by bloggers that I follow.

12 thoughts on “Today is “do-able”.”

  1. I cried when I read this. You’ve been through so much. Do you have any problems now from the pancreas problems? Your heart’s okay?
    I will zen tangle sometimes, yours are awesome. Your shirt looks like a tangle.
    You are just so cute.

    Liked by 1 person

        1. I was married in Arizona in the ruins of a Mission. It was in the fall too. Sept 3rd. The reception was all outside. Feels like it was just a few months ago, yet I feel like I’ve always known my husband. ♡

          Liked by 1 person

    1. Wendy! I did not mean to make you sad! I don’t see myself as being through a lot. I guess I have had my share. My heart is fine, my pancreas is working again, I still have fibromyalgia and a few other ‘little things’ but I am safely just in pain! 🙂 I told my husband I felt like “that” person…a “sickly person”. My husband told me, “Life dealt you a few bad hands but you fought. You are strong. You survived, that’s what I see.” I was forever changed after he said that to me. I am truly lucky Wendy.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. My ex did not see it this way..instead he became vicious verbally abusive and more to my son and i…he believed i was making it up to go
        On opiates. Ow i have to have chemo..he is suing me for a half amount of alimony and has the plan where he retires in 2 years until he is retrieving in 2 years. Im screwed


    1. You are right, until you are the one experiencing the pain, you have no idea. But it sounds like you are very empathetic! That helps so much. When a person is willing to sat that they don’t know what you are going through but you are there if they need anything. That really speaks volumes! Thank you Stephanie! -Kim


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