Put on Your Big Girl Panties and Deal!

I am battling through ‘something’… a new stage of fibromyalgia? Is this a 50 + club I have inadvertently joined? I have 2 decades of experience with this disease. Does anyone have a third decade under their belt? Did you notice any changes in your third decade? Anything that should be added to the Stages of Fibromyalgia?

So far this is what I am noticing, anyone else please chime in!

  • Just fatigue? Hell no, this fatigue has laid me out for two straight days, close to 48 hours of sleep! An infrequent hour awake here or there.
  • Increased pain. Yep. Maybe because I am not moving around as much? Mr. Pain had definitely laid claim to any waking hours I can grasp.
  • This disease is throwing me a curveball! I never swing at a curve… I may have to adjust my thinking.

This is the cruel part of fibromyalgia. If you are cognizant of the changes your body is going through it is scary, and worrisome. Is this a new symptom that will remain permanent? Am I losing my awake time? My productive time? I am losing days, not hours. Is this a stage I must go through? God help me, I am afraid.

If you are in a full-fledged fibro fog, it is not so scary. (I swear I’ve never wished for fog until this week.) It is scary for those who are observing us. Our poor caretakers. We are mimicking the first stage of fibro, all we do is sleep. For those of us who are in a fog while we flare, we kinda get off easy, we don’t remember much. We simply can’t remember.

I have started a Hemp Salve for pain. I am not going to write too much about it IMG_5021because I need a bit more time with it. So far, works on back pain, arm pain and settles restless legs ‘a bit.’ Definitely more pros than cons. Monday I will call to get my Medical Marijuana Card. I have been eligible for some time but just haven’t wanted to take that step. It Is Time.




Change is scary.


27 thoughts on “Put on Your Big Girl Panties and Deal!

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  1. I do find change kind of scary sometimes. Truthfully I hate change but I guess it is something we can’t avoid. I am thrilled that you get your Marijuana card on Monday, I have heard so many great stories about how helpful this is! I really wish the state I live in would get with the times and allow this as well, but NC is in the stone age (no pun intended). Stupid question do you need the card for the Hemp Salve? It sounds like it was helpful for your pain and I desperately need something for the constant pain I have been in lately, this might be part of the reason I hate change! I think there has been a change with the MS and I do not like it! I hope your weekend is going well and I hope Sunday is nice and relaxing for you!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Hi Alyssa. I didn’t need a MMJ card for the hemp salve. In fact the MMJ card is really a misnomer because the THC levels are so very different per state it is still very confusing. But, Hemp is legal in all states. My father-in-law got this for me, from a chiropractor. I haven’t even looked up where you can get this salve from but I would start with naturopaths? It is very expensive. See if they’ll let you try a bit, a sample. As soon as I have a month under my belt I’ll let you know if I think the $70. is worth it. K? (So far I’d say yes!) xo


  2. I am so sorry you are experiencing all of this. Although I don’t know what you are going through, I do understand just how scary new or worse symptoms make you feel both physically and mentally. I said a prayer that your MMJ will bring you relief in ways you never imagined. I use CBD oil (hemp derived) with little benefit. I think you will be glad you have taken the next step.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Ok Shelley, I know you. I know of your past struggles and some of the ‘radical’ takes you have on ‘health’ But dropping a bomb like this and then not following up with resources is not cool. Share what you follow and what you are reading? I have stopped smoking, stopped drinking, I exercise and then bam… this all hit hard. I am talking about hemp products, attempting to leave opioids behind me… I use magnesium, iron, multivitamins and get hydrated with electrolytes as well as take b12 injections, I don’t believe an ‘entitlement’ mindset comes into play here for anyone battling this disease. I have worked just as hard as you have to get well. So have the bloggers on this site. No two people find the same treatment works identically for them. So don’t toss, “entitlement” and “African” sleeping sickness around, not cool. What is this motto… get ‘real’? A radical mindset = healing??? You seem to have a lot to say on this matter so some clarification would be much appreciated. Thank you, Shelley.


  4. Maybe get an FSH test? I just had one because of symptoms I was having, especially fatigue, and it turns out that menopause is making me just a wee bit worse. I’m about to turn 53, so the timing makes sense for me:-)

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Sorry to hear you are struggling so hard right now hun. Change in my symptoms almost always puts me in panic mode. The worst part is, as you said, will this be permanent? Please let me know how things go with the MMJ card. I’ve been thinking about that one, too. Sending love and prayers your way!
    ~ Tamara

    Liked by 2 people

  6. Those big girl pants fit you well, Kim. You’ll be okay. It is scary and you’re allowed to be scared, allowed to feel whatever you feel, but know that you will be okay. Wishing you all the best with getting the Medical Marijuana Card. Keep us posted =]
    Caz xx

    Liked by 1 person

  7. I’m so sorry you are having such a hard time.
    May I ask where you got your salve from? Did you get if from a dispensary? There is a lot of junk out there, but if you get it from a dispensary you are more likely to get the good CBD stuff and you don’t need a card for it. At least here they have a cart that they bring out for you to shop from, you can only go in the back if you have a card.
    I’m learning so much, if you want to chat about it let me know. I use a tincture and vape mostly….well I also make brownies 🙂 When you get your card, do you have to go to a special prescriber? Here they are often naturopaths and they can help you find the right doses and help guide you to what strain will help you.
    I’m using CBD tincture 3 times a day, and a 1:1 tincture of CBD : THC at night to help sleep. I also have a vape that is 4:1 CBD:THC, that I use during the day if I have a migraine. I’m hoping this will help prevent my migraines.
    I did get a transdermal patch this week to try when I get my surgery, it’s 1:1 and gives a steady dose for about 12 hours. I really hope it works because I’m allergic to opioids, I’m already going to itch like crazy from the Propofol.
    I hope you are feeling better soon and this is not your new normal. Keep heart and remember, everything changes.


    1. The salve my father in law got for me through his chiropractor. I have only begun the process of getting the card. I need to figure out the rest… I’m trying so hard to follow your comments but it reads like a medical manual I’ve never seen! I must be daft! As soon as I get my brain around this we must chat. You need to focus on your surgery and healing! Very important! By then I should be outta my haze and we can talk vape, tincture, and patches! Love ya Wen!


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